I’d like to compile a large list of the best golf excuses for bad play you’ve heard. You can add your own by clicking on the comments link below.
Here are a few to start:
There was a bug on my ball.
I need new grips.
It was in between clubs.
That gust of wind knocked it off line.
The ball was in a divot.
The sun was in my eyes.
If only that tree hadn’t been there.
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How about: My allergies were acting up
It’s been said that Ivan Lendl, the tennis player, always blamed grass allergies for bad play at wimbledon even though he is an avid golfer
That guy walking by distracted me. (followed by)
Someone stole my ball.
(This happened to me today).
The club slipped
my balls are cold.
my putter won’t hit straight.
the sun is too high in the sky.
the greens need mowed.
i’m used to playing on better grass than this.
i lost my sunglasses.
that 8 mph wind is killing my game.
“The shadow from my head eclipsed the ball.”
(After making shot to a Par 3 landing 20 yards short) “…with this wind in my face this hole is definitely playing a lot longer than it did yesterday when it was dead calm.” OR “I think the tees are further back today than they were yesterday.”
“Did you see that putt trail off as it got to the hole?” …is sometimes followed up with “Check out all the spikemarks around the hole.” OR “The greenskeeper did a poor job cutting that one…he definitely left a raised lip around the cup.”
“Borrowed (or rental) clubs…”
My dad was a real good golf player. I never tried it myself but used to go with him and watch him and his friends play. I heard every possible excuse there is.
Cant grip the club as i used to… damn this wedding ring…..
My dad used to play with a handicap of 2…. a solid golfer and a fierce competitor….
Instead of using a glove, he used to chew chewing gum and spit on his hands…..
Anyway, one day i was out playing with him…. and he sliced a shot miles into the trees….. he then turned around and said…. yeah… i knew i should have stuck to wrigley’s and not changed to this sugar free crap…..
Excessive bird chirpage, distracted by airplane noise, surprised by cart girl, distracted by ranger, sun in eyes, cut in golf ball cover, too windy, bug in eye, bee buzzing around head, stone in shoe, barking dog, cart partner farted, angina, suddenly bloated, dry throat, cracked lips, pink eye, tear in glove, ball hit yardage marker
I just ate fried chicken
The sun was in my ears.