So Different! – Golf Poetry

SO DIFFERENT! 

I THOUGHT it hard luck when I met her, 
Introduced by our hostess, and found 
That the maid and myself, for the evening 
Thro' dinner and auction were bound. 
She didn't appeal, not the slightest. 
Her sun-freckled face had no charm, 
While the style of her dress was weird, I confess, 
And the prospect I viewed with alarm. 

I bucked up my best ; conversation,
Intended to cheer and impress. 
Seemed only the maid to embarrass, 
And ended in rather a mess. 
Still later, at auction, confound it. 
She trumped my good queen, and revoke — 
'Twas something she loved to indulge in, 
Till the game on our side was a joke. 

Then, hang it, next day in the foursomes. 
We were drawn, and thus partners were we 
In a mixed competition, important,
That I wanted a winner to be. 
With a shrug of the shoulder — 'twas kismet, 
I bowed to omnipotent fate. 
And stepped to the tee, a martyr per se, 
Prepared for the worst — desolate. 

But lo and behold! With amazement 
I watched this young partner of mine 
Drive off with a graceful abandon. 
Perfection of motion divine. 
Compared with my own puny efforts,
A dub in her eyes I would seem, 
For she was a regular player, 
While I was the merest "has been." 

W. Hastings Webling
in Lyrics of the Links, published 1921